Tears of a Clown

I've had a song playing in my head for over a week. I don't usually mind when my inner jukebox is on play but this song is depressing.

"Tears of a Clown" by The Miracles

It's about a man that's trying not to show his ex that he's still sad that they're broken up. At least that's how I always interpreted it. But if you break down the lyrics, there's some pretty profound shit in there that could also be talking about depression.

Now if there's a smile on my face
It's only there trying to fool the public
But when it comes down to fooling you
Now, honey, that's quite a different subject

But don't let my glad expression
Give you the wrong impression
Really I'm sad
Oh, I'm sadder than sad
You're gone and I'm hurtin' so bad  <--- probably about a breakup
Like a clown I pretend to be glad

Now they're some sad things known to man
But ain't too much sadder than
The tears of a clown
When there's no one around
Hmm hmm, oh yeah, baby

Now if I appear to be carefree
It's only to camouflage my sadness
In order to shield my pride I try
To cover this hurt with a show of gladness

But don't let my show convince you
That I've been happy since you  <--definitely about a breakup
Decided to go
(Decided to go)
Oh, I need you so
(I need you so)
I'm hurt…

Maybe if I write about this song it will get the fuck out of my head. I've been waking up everyday with the lines haunting me and I've had it. I figure it must mean something. It usually does when I'm stuck like this. The only thing I can think of is that I'm battling the sads lately and I don't like to show it. I feel like I'm not worthy of them and try to ignore they're there. I guess I can't deny it anymore.