Friday, February 1, 2019

Sorry Not Sorry

This should be interesting. I took a pill to help me sleep about 30 minutes ago and it has failed to kick in. But I can totally feel it making my eyelids heavy and my brain a little foggy so I thought I'd just do one of those stream of consciousness blogs. I can't promise this will make any sense at all.

I've recently read a couple of story collections by women that I relate to very well. One, I admire quite a bit-Jenny Lawson, or The Blogess. I really like the way she writes. She is strong in her words, and yet vulnerable too. She shares a lot and doesn't keep things in the way others might. I try to write that way.

The other author I read was Laurie Notaro and while there were similarities, I didn't like her stories as much. A lot are written with a self deprecating tone and I think I'm too empathetic to read them. I understood that she exaggerates to enhance the story but I don't think you have to do so in the extent that the meaning of your words gets lost.

Of course what the hell do I know? They're published and I'm on a blog with 24 followers. Unless you count Facebook. Maybe. I don't know, I don't really know how my page on there works.

It's getting increasingly more challenging to type and my cat just found a bottle cap that evidently is his prey. Earlier I found a pinecone just inside the cat door and a twig in the kitchen so...this is better I guess?  Cats are weird.

I think I'm finally a real resident of this town now. I've lived here for 4 years and it's taken awhile for me to stop using my gps every time I go to the store. (Not all stores. I'm still not sure how to get to Fred Meyer but I know where Target is and really, do any other stores really matter?). But I've been drinking kombucha so it's pretty official that I am now a native.

I was going to say something witty here about how welcome baskets for PNW would have salmon, coffee, I don't know, mushrooms or something and definitely kombucha.

But see, there are tons of different kinds and not every palate can handle the carbonated vinegar goodness. The first time I tasted one I vowed to never again defile my taste buds in such a horrific fashion. But then a friend said, "Try this one. It doesn't taste like the other ones." And because I trust her, I bought one and holy shit it's delicious. I have since bought half a dozen more and in super tasty flavors like blueberry acai and mango pomegranate. It's so good AND it cleans out the pizza I had the night before. So, if you're one of my 24 followers, Humm brand kombucha, I'm a fan.

I'm NOT a fan of Justin Timberlake's juice. That Bai stuff is just...weird. The first sip and I immediately tasted peach which is good because it was in fact a peach flavored drink. But then the sick sweet FAKE taste of not sugar hit the back of my throat and I just cringed. I checked the label and saw stevia was there, lurking in the list of organic natural flavors. Stevia was great when I was doing keto and living off of wannabe brownies but now that I've changed my eating lifestyle and just limit myself to real sugar stuff, the alternatives are just awful. I respect Stevia for what it is but it tastes like shit. Sorry.

Oh wait, I'm not supposed to be apologizing. And actually, I'm not sorry. Who cares if I don't like Stevia or Justin Timberlake's juice? You can like it. I don't have to be sorry we don't agree. If we don't. But if we don't, you're wrong and then I'm sorry FOR you because you eat things like Stevia.

I saw a good human today. Well, I saw several but this one wasn't a friend or anyone I knew. She was just a nice person. It was so exciting to see they still exist! I felt like Dr. Grant when he sees the first brontosaurus in Jurassic Park. 

This good human was our server at lunch. It was extremely crowded and it took a very long time to have anyone acknowledge us. I mean, at all. And I usually get pretty pissy about that kind of service. I could see they were busy but I was also being judgy and could see that they were all over the place. I saw one server...and that was it. Then a cook came out from the kitchen. Yikes. And then I saw another girl taking orders and I was feeling a little better, despite the hangries. My friends and I were discussing the potential danger to our loved ones when we were suffering from hangry-itis when the good human came to our table.

She greeted us warmly and took our orders. One of my friends had a question and the good human responded, "Well, yes, I think we can do that. I'm not sure, but I'm pretty sure... I don't work here."

My friends and I were stunned. She explained that she felt sorry for the lone server and had gotten up to help. Just because she could and it was a good human thing to do. We all became less pissy about waiting, even though it still took a super long time. But when the food came out, it was hot and good and the good human left us our check right when the food came and wished us a good day. We left a big tip and a renewed faith that there are still good humans out there.

Good humans that hopefully are sleeping because not sleeping sucks. Turns out writing on a sleeping pill is a little weird and writing about an actual occurrence instead of just rambling is hard. Writing under the influence may cause side affects. <== like typos.

I think I'm gonna try the whole sleep thing again since my current thoughts are just about how to make words out of the letters I'm pushing.

Hopefully at least a little bit of this made sense. But if it didn't, I'm not sorry.

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